As a fifth-generation New Yorker with close ties to a large, local extended family, I am keenly aware that a significant part of who I am—my understanding of the world and my values — is shaped by my grandparents and other older adult figures. This awareness led me to seek out meaningful ways to give back. This summer, I had the opportunity to become a teen intern for DOROT, a nonprofit organization whose mission is to help combat social isolation for older adults living in NYC.
When I first stepped into the heavily air-conditioned DOROT building just a few blocks from my apartment, I was nervous about meeting older adults who weren’t related to me. Initially, when speaking to the older adults, I was unsure how to act. I stumbled over what to talk about given our age gap or how to make any connections. However, as the weeks passed, I realized there was nothing to be nervous about. I grew to respectfully agree and disagree with the older adults on their views through planning and facilitating intergenerational workshops, visiting seniors’ homes and simply having conversations over tea and cookies.
I often found myself drawn to three older individuals, each bringing their unique charm to our weekly conversations. Vivian, with her bright red lips and oversized round glasses; Jeff, always in high-waisted pants and suspenders, his smile warm and inviting; and Dan, a retired theater enthusiast who loved floral shirts. Despite our age differences, we connected easily, sharing both similarities and the distinct contrasts of our childhoods. Some of these included the radio versus Spotify or the milkman versus Uber Eats. In one conversation, we debated the impact of social media on friendships. Jeff believed it weakened bonds, while I argued it could create new connections. Through these discussions, I realized that despite our different backgrounds, we shared common values of connection and community.
Each week, I visited Marvin, a retired dentist and captain in the Air Force, at his home. At 85 years old, Marvin spends most of his time meditating and constructing neon signs. His most recent project is building a 25-foot-long neon sign of the New York City skyline. Growing up with a traumatic childhood, Marvin values connecting with as many people as he can. He once told me, “how do you know if you don’t want to talk to someone if you don’t talk to them at all?” At the end of the internship, I created a scrapbook of the information he told me about his life, his legacy, and the wisdom he imparted on me. His reaction to the scrapbook was one of deep gratitude, and the process of creating it helped me appreciate the importance of documenting and honoring the lives of those who have come before us.
Through Marvin, I have learned valuable life lessons that I hope to carry with me throughout my everyday life:
- Kindness, love, appreciation and compassion are all inside each of us, even though they may not be visible every day.
- The importance of having an open mind when meeting new people.
- Embracing true empathy and acceptance of others.
- Embracing your complete, imperfect self.
- Acknowledging that transformation and self-growth are natural and take time.
More than before, I am driven to learn about and amplify the experiences of prior generations before they are lost. DOROT provides thousands of older adults with resources and opportunities to continue to pass on their legacies, get support and create meaningful connections with multiple generations. My experience with DOROT has reinforced my belief that we must provide older adults with companionship and respond to their needs while learning from them about how to live a happy, meaningful and fulfilling life. As I move forward, I am committed to continuing this work and ensuring that the voices of the past are not only heard but celebrated.
